Words can't bring you down, but my love can
by WobblyWallyIsInLove
Summary: She wanted nothing to do with her current life, that is, if it meant leaving behind everyone she loved for another loved one, and yet, Is this love worth it? She smiled, of course it was.
1. Hello I love you

_Name of series_: Glee

_Couples_: Rachel Berry & Finn Hudson / Rachel Berry & Jesse St. James

_Warning: __**SPOILER!**_

_Disclaiming_: Glee does not belong to me

_Story Summary_: She wanted nothing to do with her current life, that is, if it meant leaving behind everyone she loved for another loved one, and yet, Is this love worth it? She smiled, of course it was.

_Chapter_: 1

_Status_: Incomplete!

She really tried to make it better, but how could she? All the feelings she ever had just had to come back up and explode right in her face, The love she felt for Finn, the love she feels for Jesse, the affection she holds for Glee Club.

She couldn't explain herself, but she tried, and Jesse had said it, he wanted nothing to do with her. He was never going to get over her video and she knew it. And yet she tried to kid herself, trying to convince herself he would see the light at the end of the tunnel, that he would forgive her, that he would love her back.

But it was not until he attacked her, that she realized just how wrong had she been, she had to live with her conscience now and all she could do was try to move on. And she would do so by proving herself, and by proving her power of will. Throwing eggs on her was the last straw, and she was ready to fight back.

The lights dimmed and Glee Club got into their positions, they were ready. They had rehearsed for this. They _deserved_ this recognition. The curtains were pulled and she took one deep breath. It was time to show them all what they could do. And what Vocal Adrenaline would never surpass them in, and that was the passion and talent.

She turned to look at Finn now, the words he had just spoken would have to be evaluated later, her mind was shutting off. It was now just auto-pilot, it was just Glee club, Finn and her. And the passion she had felt for him. And the love for music, but above all, the love for those two men in the audience, her fathers. She had to show them just how good she was, and how perfect she could be.

They were the reason of why she pushed herself so much, they had given her opportunities, a life. Classes and coursed since she was 3, how could she fail? She smiled at Finn and nodded as the music started, Jesse was also somewhere in the audience, but now, that didn't matter. She was ready for all of it. _**Let the show begin! **_Was her only thought.

Highway run

Into the midnight sun

Wheels go round and round

You're on my mind

Restless hearts

Sleep alone tonight

Sendin' all my love

Along the wire

They say that the road

Ain't no place to start a family

Right down the line

It's been you and me

And lovin' a music man

Ain't always what it's supposed to be

Oh boy, you stand by me

I'm forever yours...faithfully

Circus life

Under the big top world

We all need the clowns

To make us smile

Through space and time

Always another show

Wondering where I am

Lost without you

And being apart ain't easy

On this love affair

Two strangers learn to fall in love again

I get the joy

Of rediscovering you

Oh girl, you stand by me

I'm forever yours

...faithfully

Oh, oh, oh, oh Faithfully,

I'm still yours I'm forever yours

Ever yours...faithfully.

She smiled as she tried to catch her breath. They had done it, the first part was down, now… the other two… she took a quick look at Finn, making sure he was fine too. And another one for the cast, a quick scan, making sure everyone was in their place. They were, had she ever felt so proud of them.

XxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxX

He clapped along with the audience, she was spectacular, as always. His little princess was making the light shine on her, and he hoped she still would after leaving for his plan. His darling agreed with him, and they both wanted that insufferable woman out of their Rachel's life. Biological mother or not, she had no rights over Rachel until she turned 18, and that was a long way to go.

They watched their princess shine and excel their own expectations, he turned to look at his lovely husband, they just smiled at each other. She was more than ready.

XxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxX

He smiled inwardly, she had been great of course, and he was secretly proud of her. After all, she was his Rachel. The rest of his group were either silent, or clapping out of respect. My eyes just kept on looking at Rachel. The way we ended, the way I dumped her, the eggs, the screamming, the tears. I regret it all and I wished I could have done it differently, but with this performace, she showed me she was proving herself. And I saw her eyes scan the audience, and finally stop.

I tried to find too, however she was searching for, but he was out of my reach. And I surprised myself by standing up and some of my friends looked at me with a 'What-the-heck-do-you-think-you're-doing' look, I just shrugged. "I need to use the bathroom quickly", and I ran to the exit. I needed air and mind as well, a trip to the bathroom. I saw her on the way, she was pacing on the hallway, and I stopped to get a peak at her.

She was wearing the same dress she wore on stage, and she still looked beautiful, but I knew she didn't care about that this moment, I was about to approach her when I heard a male voice too. "Rachel Berry, you were magnificent", I narrowed my eyes at that one, she loved that word when applied to herself.

I walked quickly, but saw the man hugging her, she was smiling, and some tears were running down her cheeks, "Thank you Daddy, you have no idea just how much that means to me!" I scoffed, I could have said that too.

"Where's Mommy?" she asked and I heard no response. But then again, Rachel's life was always perfect wasn't it? She was as perfect as she could, and I hated that too.

XxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxX

Gregory was there, but where was Lucas? Had he seen me too? I had always called Gregory 'daddy' and Lucas 'Mommy' but I always felt it backwards. And yet, I never did anything about it. Sometimes I wished I met my biological mother, but then I turned and saw my fathers, whom I still owe so much, and it makes me doubt my birth mother could ever been as good to me.

I walked back to the backstage where the rest of the Glee cast rested, my hand was taken and my surprise was more than enough to make me yelp. "Oh Dear, did I scare you much, Rache?" he said and I smiled, my heart slowing down, and yet I felt disappointed, it was just Lucas. "Oh, sorry Lucas. Yes, you took me by surprise, that's all". He just smiled at me and my disappointment fled out the door. I was a very lucky girl.

Next thing I knew, I was left alone in the bathroom. Crying silently to who would never help me, and for once, I wished I wasn't Rachel Berry, the singer, the Glee Club Star, the ex fan girl of Finn, the one with a broken heart from Jesse st. James… I wished I was just Rachel, with no special talent.

XxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxX

I was more than nervous, I had told Rachel, or almost, that I loved her. And my heart was still pounding in my chest, was that normal? I didn't know, but why was she taking so long? Well, she was a chick, so that meant she was probably in the bathroom.

I always wondered what chicks did in the bathroom, like, why did they need to go in groups? Maybe they did some stuff they needed help with… but then ho- _**concentrate Finn! **_I scolded myself. Rachel was late. Rachel was never late, as in…she'd kill something before that. I was pacing myself, and I saw Mercedez, "Hey Mercedez, did you see Rachel around?" she shook her head and continued to talk to Kurt.

I looked at Quinn, she was dozing off on Puck's shoulder and I smiled, even if I wasn't the father, I still wanted to help her. But then again, back to my current problem, I stopped pacing and I just asked out loud, "Has anyone seen Rachel? She's late". I said, as in to try to make a point. It was then when they started freaking out. Finally.

It wasn't until half of us left to get Rachel that we saw her coming out of the bathroom, rubbing her eyes. I saw the redness around them and I knew it was from crying. She froze when she saw us and her head just went low. Wow, I've never seen her do that before.

She kept her head dipped low and passed us all, walking fast into the room where the other half waited in, when the rest of us followed, I saw Mercedez and Quinn giving each other a weird look.

XxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxX

Something was wrong, as in a very-very way, as in Kurt wearing simple jeans and a grocery store t-shirt with no accessories whatsoever, Rachel had been crying. Okay, you might not get it, but Rachel berry never cries. She did not cry for Finn, or Puck, or even Jesse and heck, girl. I thought someone died.

Quinn and I exchanged looks and I saw Finn seeing our small exchange, poor boy, he probably thought we were thinking of ponies or something. No offense to Finn, but he's not the smartest cookie on the pan. Quinn followed, her Prego steps faltering a couple of times. She was getting big, and that reminded me of talking with the other girls into making her a baby shower.

We walked into the room, and saw Rachel sitting. As in on the couch. Just sitting, not bossing everyone around, not practicing her winner speech, not listening to music or other's presentations… just sitting.

Quinn, Tina and I instantly went to her side, don't misunderstand me, I've never particularly liked Rachel, but she was a friend now. And she was obviously depressed, and it went further that any boy problem. This was serious.

XxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxXxxxxxxX

I sat next to Rachel and saw the look on her face, the glazed eyes, the red rims around her eyes, and no, she wasn't doing drugs. She had been crying, and hard. My baby kicked inside my rounded belly and I winced, but Rachel had a bigger problem now. My hand squeezed her shoulder and she bit her lip. I turned to Finn. "Get every guy out, except Kurt". it wasn't long until we were all alone.

"Now Rachel, you're going to tell us why you're so depressed. And no more lies". I watched her take a deep breath. And her next words shocked me to my bones, "I… I just wish for once, I wasn't Rachel Berry the Glee star, or the dancer, or the talented woman", under normal circumstances I would have rolled my eyes at her modesty, but I let her be for once, "and just wished I were just Rachel. No talents, not pressure. No tears."

This was big, and something nudged my conscious, telling me we were all going to be shocked for what she would say next.

**Aghssmf jfiufri utm iutsss!**

**Glee doesn't belong to me, but my ideas, my imagination and this story does. Hope you liked it, first TV series story! Look for the next chapter, it should be out soon too. Please review and let me know what you think of this.**

**See that button under this? Click ADD TO FAVORITES! (; **

**WobblyWallyIsInLove… is out. **


	2. Fire me up

I wanted to cry so badly, it was horrible. I really wanted to say no to what Lucas had told me, but the way he said it, "_I'm so proud of you, and Greg and I did our best to send you to that School filled with talent in Europe"_, it practically yelled for me to accept instantly.

I bit my lip, who was I to disturb this peace? I took a deep breath and stood up, I tried my best to smile even though I knew it looked unreal to the others, I took small steps and finally took the biggest step in the whole evening, I opened the door and watched the guys shift in their positions, Finn was standing against the wall, while Noah and Michael talked and Artie and the rest just listened.

"I… We should go take our seats and watch the rest of the teams, after all, this is just the beginning of the night, is it not?" she did not wait for an answer. She just walked out, her not-so confident steps faltering after getting into deep thought. Not only was this her last time on an american stage, but she would have to leave the stage, her (few) friends here and her ex-boyfriend. Also, that implied not ever talking to her newfound biological mother, which she had only found due to Jesse.

Somehow, her mind started on that simple fact. Her biological mother, and her fathers. She tried to not put too much thought into it, who was she to start doubting her fathers when they had only been loving and great to her? She shook her head and kept her head straight and her chin up as she watched 'Vocal Adrenaline' sing and interpret another song, truth was, it hurt. The way Jesse just moved and it was not until a couple of eye catching moments between the two of them that she stood and walked away.

She felt the stare of her own Glee Club teammates but she tried her best to ignore it, she bit her lip as she walked as quickly as she could before breaking into a half-jog, she kept reminding herself she could hurt herself badly if she ran in heels like the ones she was wearing.

It wasn't until the sky broke apart while she drove that she knew where exactly she was driving. It was time to say a final goodbye at the place where it all started. She found herself walking into the tremendous doors with a soaking dress and her hair stringy from being in the rain. She wouldn't have had that problem if she had just walked in instead of taking her time admiring the 'McKinley High School' sign.

She just knew this would be a very hard time to say goodbye. She did not bother in staying because the pain in her chest was swelling and even though they were great, she couldn't bear even the mere thought of loosing to Jesse and having to watch his smug face at her direction, and with that thought, she walked into the auditorium, turning the lights on and just sitting in one of the may chairs.

She closed her eyes as she let herself weep silently into her hands, Rachel Berry will be strong after this, she promised herself. But for now, she just wanted/needed to weep.

He was going crazy, where had she gone? One minute she was just there and the next she had fucking stormed off, don't get him off, he didn't care much for the Crazy lady except for the fact she was his teammate and his friend. But hell, why did she storm off?

He shrugged, he did not have to put up with this too, he figured it was just another chick thing, he already had to put up with this shit from Quinn and having his baby mama like that was more than enough. It wasn't until the judges decided to be assholes and name Voca-gay adrenaline guys the champs that we all realized it was too quiet. No Rachel. Hell no.

Next fucking thing I know, she's been gone for the past hour, and we are all looking for her, while that ass of her ex boyfriend is too busy showing off to all the audience, if I could see myself in a mirror right now, I think I'd have the same expression as Kurt or Tina. Fucking worried sick.

Oh god, between my cravings and running to find crazy Rachel, I was not liking this day. And to make it worse, I tried calling the number she had given us all, more like encrypted into all of our phones, but she never picked up, and when I say never, I'm trying to say we all called at least twice. No answer.

Now I was getting worried because of her crying rant she had earlier, how had I missed her leaving? Well focus Quinn! What had I been doing? Ooooh, I had been eating that delicious peanut butter ice cream with some of Puck's hamburgers' pickles on it. Yum, now that I think of it, I'm hungry again- this is not good.

I decided to stay in the lobby with Artie, in case she came looking for us. She never did, but Mr. Schue did and well, I was freaking out by then. And those asses of Vocal Adrenaline were just passing by, I glared at Shelby, their coach. Truth was, I had become a good friend to Rachel and she had told me about the hold mommy drama. I understood and yet all I could think was how did I not think of it first.

I swaggered to her and gripped her forearm, I didn't bother with congratulating them, "Where the hell is Rachel?" I asked and I saw Jesse slow down, something catching his attention, I knew it was the Rachel part. "Excuse me?" she tried to get my hand of her arm, but my grip got tighter. "Look, all I know is she suddenly disappeared and you being her mother and all that crap, should know something!" Jesse decided it was not as important because he kept on walking after that.

"I do not know how you found out about me being Rachel's mother, but I assure you I'm done with that" and with that, the bitch left as quick as she could. The sudden thought came to me, her words echoing in my mind, I turned to Mr. Schue, "I know where she is".

Of course she'd want to go to the place where she felt safe. Where it all started.

Rachel was gone? I tried to distract myself, so what? Why did that matter to me? All I knew so far was that she just left, so? But now, I slowed down when I saw a bunch of the Glee kids run into their cars and vehicles, and all of them shouting directions to each other. I picked up a few words like, 'School', 'Rachel' and 'find her!'.

She had run off to go to school? What had happened? I hated the fact I still cared so much for her and my heart ached when I remembered her betrayal. I should have been enough for her and yet I wasn't but then again, I had originally befriended her for Shelby. But he hadn't expected him to fall in love. That was out of the plan.

But he couldn't help but wonder why she looked so heartbroken when he saw her after her show. He'd have to get the scoop later, but for now, it was time for him, Jesse St. James to have fun. And celebrate his victory.

By the time I heard the door open and voices flood the school, I was already too into the piano in front of me, this was my last performance, and I was wishing someone had recorded it, but why was I being so childish? It was not as if I wouldn't see them again, it was just… that she wouldn't see them in a while.

It wasn't until she heard a very distinctive voice caught her off and took her out of her trance. It was Kurts. "Rachel Berry! Just what the hell do you think you're doing?" his voice sounded distressed, but she pain no attention, she kept on playing, her fingers now playing automatically, never faltering.

_When i was young i never needed anyoneand making love was just for funthose days are goneliving along i think of all the friends i've knownbut when i dial the telephonenobody homeall by myselfdon't wanna beall by myselfanymorehard to be sure, sometimes i feel so insecureand love as a distant end obscureremains the cureall by myselfdont wanna beall by myselfanymoreall by myselfdont wanna liveall by myselfanymore(instumental)when i was youngi never needed anyoneand making love was just for funthose days are goneall by myselfdont wanna beall by myselfanymoreall by myselfdont wanna liveohhhhhhhhdont wanna live by myself,by myself, by myself ...anymoreohhhhhhhhhall by myself_

_Her voice trailed off and by the time she lifted her teary eyes, she saw almost all of her fellow Glee members and teammates watching her with ultimate confusion. "It's my last song on this stage, I wanted to make the best of it", she whispered and stood carefully and yet, the rest noticed, her posture perfect as always._

_It was Finn who answered first, "What do you mean it's your last?" his voice sounded so… Lost? "It means, my fathers will be arranging… my exchange at Jilliards-Khoel talented Musical School in a couple of days". The silence remained after her words were long gone and she looked down, she just had to wait. Mercedes was the first to speak, "Girl, if you're doing this because we lost, well, you must be wack-o", Kurt nodded after her._

"_It has nothing to do with us loosing the Regionals, it has to do with my fathers. And how much they've given for me to reach fame, they were the ones who gave me this opportunity, a life. And I'll never be able to be grateful enough. So our goodbyes start here." _

_Oh hell, Finn was shocked, Quinn was gaping, Noah was glaring at something above my head, Mercedes and Kurt exchanged looks and Artie, Tina, Mike and Matt just didn't know what to do._

_This had gone wrong, she had just wanted to say goodbye, and now she found herself crying while being hugged from all directions, this was not productive, this was bad, the silent alarm in her head went off,_

_She pulled away and took a deep breath, put a smile on her face and looked at each other. "I just wanted to let you all know that during this time that I've been with Glee Club, I considered you my friends, and I was hoping you and I would stay in contact after my departure". _

_She smiled one last time at her friends before the silence erupted in the room._

_She was leaving. She was leaving to some fancy school, and I did not like that. Rachel looked so broken, so sad it was actually tugging at me to give her a hug. And I do not give hugs, I am a badass and I would never consider doing this before but she's somewhat special, I mean we dated and all and I actually liked her. A lot._

_So fuck, why is this so hard? Why would my legs not move, I just stood there looking like some pansy while the rest were murmuring words to her ear, and Finn looked so heartbroken it was just fucking depressing. _

"_Why are you leaving? It's not what you want, right?" I asked and I think I actually saw some surprised faces at my logical question, that put Berry off for a minute. "It's my decision and I should have enough privacy to keep it that way". _

_I frowned, what the fuck was that? So now she wouldn't share? I scoffed, "Fine with me, you all mop while I go do something worth my time". and with that, I walked out._

_Slowly, one by one started leaving and I was just downright angry, Rachel was leaving and the guys just ditched us? Now all who was left was Brittany, Santana, Mercedez and Kurt, Artie had left due to his father and I stayed because of Rachel._

_Just then, I frowned, "Quinn, are you alright?" Rachel asked with so much words, why could she not just say 'Dude, you're spacing out and frowning at nothing", like Santana just did. I shook my head, losing my thoughts in the process. It wasn't until around 6 pm when we all left, Rachel getting into her own car to go home. I gave her one last smile, that Rachel smiled back. After that, I didn't see her again for the whole week._

_Glee club was a mess for the past week, and it sucked big time because we were short on a female diva/star singer, but then again, it wasn't like other people tried for it, but they were just not Rachel. And I think I actually said it to one girl, the girl just looked at me and started tearing up, man, I hate these stuff. _

_Time was going on slowly and I hated the fact I did not have her anymore, it was hard. I couldn't sleep because she'd sing in my dreams, and it wasn't until she had been gone for a month and a half that I saw Jesse St. James, that scumbag, run in and I'm pretty sure he was looking for Rachel because he had a weird look on his face, in my dreams too. _

_She had been gone for that long, huh? If I didn't know Puck as much as I do, I'd say he was acting normal, but I could see he was sad too. And when I tried to talk to him about it, he just called me a pansy and shoved me against a locker. Yeah, that was his way to express himself. _


	3. You made me stronger

By the time I saw Rachel again, I felt my heart swell, we were all relaxing when Kurt's laptop started buzzing, he walked to it and just froze. "Oh My God, Guys, Rachel is calling me on skype!". He clicked on the 'Answer Video call' video and we all crowded ourselves around the camera, there she was, smiling at the camera.

I smiled and waved back, only to hit Santana in the face accidentally and her sudden moving made her crash into Mercedes, which did not do any good. She smiled at the camera once more and laughed. God, she was happy there. For some reason, I wanted her to be sad and wanted her to come back.

I was so wrong.

I looked at the screen, I was the only one sitting, since I was the one with the huge stomach. We were all looking at the camera and I saw that she was wearing some sort of ballet one piece tutu thing, and her hair was pulled up, but what I saw the most was her skin, she was so pale and hag bags under her eyes, even though she tried to cover them with make up.

I didn't even bother to wait for Kurt to stop telling her about the hideous costumes Mr. Schue had chosen, "Rachel, are you okay? You look pale and sick". I watched along with all the other guys as her eyes widened and she smiled forcefully. "I am fine, Quinn. How are you and the baby doing?" she was trying to change the subject, and I let it slip for this time.

"Fine, due date is in about a week or so". I didn't know why, but I wanted her to be here for it. I sighed, "So, how is it all there?" Finn interrupted me and asked a silly question, "Made any friends, Rach?" I looked at her face on the screen, she smiled and as she was about to say something, a man walked in with a wet shirt on, he was dripping. She turned around and rolled her eyes, "Oh Logan, I thought I told you to stay away from puddles…"she scolded, and smiled as she stood to grab him a towel.

I didn't know what her relationship with the man, but he was sure hot. Blonde with what seemed green eyes, a friendly smile. "OH 'iya Rachy, you know how much I love puddles, and water… but you might want to shut it off, Madam Khoel is coming, and you know how much she hate-!" he got cut off when a lady walked in, she gave one scan and Rachel managed to turn off the monitor, but the camera was still rolling.

"Miss Berry, what exactly where you doing?" she asked and gave the computer one long and snobby look. "I was just handing Logan a towel, Madame Khoel". and with that, she was tugged by Logan onto the stage.

Finn and Puck were boiling with anger and bent up frustration, what the hell with that dude? All they could do now was watch with some control as she stretched and Logan sat in her seat, he half turned and started whispering into the camera, "Okay mates, I'm Logan Neednam and I'm Rache's partner for the singing. She's about to go on, and you might want to see this, it's a Christina Aguilera act, honestly, I didn't think Rach would do the sexy act, but she nailed it".

He moved a little to the left and the stage was now dark, but the lights went on and Rachel came out wearing a short dress and a barrette on her head. "Oh God", and there she was, dancing her life away and singing like no other. Her passion for the show and the competition showing entirely.

She was happy, and even though she looked a little sick, they'd have to live with it, it wasn't until a couple of days later, when they talked to her again, that she looked worse. It was not okay, and whatever she had was getting worse.

I bit the inside of my cheek, something was defenitly wrong and I was not liking it. I looked at Puck and he gave me the same look back, it was a 'What the hell is wrong with Berry?' look, and I saw it before. Wow, I didn't even think of it before, why hadn't Rachel told us about Logan? I wish it wasn't because she was dating him or something.

I scowled as I drank from my water bottle, Shelby had been extra rough on practice today and I took deep breaths, "Jesse!" I heard one of my teammates call out for me, "What is it?" I just wanted to start singing again, for some reason the Rachel issue had been annoying me for a while now and I did not like it.

I was asked by Shelby to go with her to McKinley high to give Mr. Schue a message, something about a challenge their campus director had proposed, and as they drove they talked about new songs and moves, it was no secret Shelby trusted him enough with that.

When they arrived, Shelby asked some student about where they could find Mr. Schuester and while she did that, Jesse looked for any sign of Rachel. He hadn't even heard of her for the past weeks and it was starting to worry him, where was she? Who was she with? That ass of Finn or that Puck guy? He sighed, I just wanted this to be over with.

We both walked in the auditorium and I stopped walking when I saw what was on the projector screen. Rachel. "Rachel?" I whispered and I saw Shelby stop too. We walked to the Glee Club New directions team, and we sat down. The lights had been shut off and the projector was connected to someone's computer, a few clicks and the webcam on what he guessed was Rachel's computer went on.

Finn had the computer on his lap and his face was seen on the small square at the right bottom corner of the projector image, a blonde man came on. "Hiya Glee Club". he said and smiled friendly, Jesse scowled, I though this was about Rachel?

"Hey Logan, just pass Rachel on will you?" Finn said and Quinn elbowed him on the ribs, "Ow, Quinn, that hurt!" the man on the camera web, Logan he thought, knew about Rachel. Who was he? He just clenched his fists, ready to strike at anything. "Actually, you might want to wait a minute, when I woke her up this morning she actually hit me. Repeatedly. Who knew Rachel berry was a grump when woken up? Did you know she cuddles a lot? She practically squeezed the air out of me last night" he said it so casually, it pissed him off.

I could see that Finn and Puck didn't like it either, and Mercedes had a dreamy look on her face, so did Kurt. It was Brittany who had the computer now, "Hey Logan, how is she doing?" she asked and my curiosity peaked at this, first of all, where was she? Who was this Logan guy? And most importantly, why was he sleeping in her bed?

Logan took the computer and stood up, he walked a couple of steps and all the camera could see was a door, Jesse was practically clutching his seat, what was behind that door? He opened it and walked in, the computer on one hand and by the camera angle, you could see some of his face, he stopped. "Rach, are you decent?" he asked and his laugh echoed, all the Glee members watched.

A female laugh was heard -**Rachel's! **his mind automatically shouted- and he heard her voice again, "Oh Logan, I am always decent. Stop being so immature", she scolded and he walked in the small room, she was sitting on one of the beds and she looked so pale, but the smile was on her face. She saw the computer and the smile widened. "Guys!" she said and giggled, her voice was somewhat hoarse.

Logan sat next to her and she yawned, that's when he noticed the IV bag and the needle in her arm, he panicked. What had happened? Oh god, was Rachel okay?

All of them panicked when they saw the IV bag and the needle in her forearm, "Oh my God, Rachel are you okay?" the girl just giggled and her eyes were dazed, "Lo-gan, Lo-gan, could you pass me that water bottle, please?" she asked and laid her head on his shoulder, "Why am I always tired? Did you know that I was singing with Karl this morning after you woke me up and guess what! He sang 'You're beautiful' to me, that was nice of him. He's always been a nice person, when I can get up and bake, I think I'll bake him a nice, pear crusted pie. Did you know that those are my favorite ones? I used to bake them with my dad every night, obviously every night a different filling, but we always had extra pie and so when Noah's mom sent him over I gave him pie while he compained about how talkative and annoying I was, and I-!" she got cut off by his hand, "Rach, drink your water and read your book, then you can tell them all about your crazy stories", Puck narrowed his eyes, _**he**_ used to do that to Rachel.

Rachel obliged and started reading, her eyes dropping a bit and then she fell asleep. "About time, she woke up vomiting again and she hasn't been able to eat since. The doctor came and gave her some antibiotics, but he couldn't figure what was wrong, and the medicine makes her oozy. She spent half an hour telling me about how she missed her weekends, and then she told me about some things she used to do with you guys". Finn was scowling, Quinn was holding the sleeping Beth to her chest while Puck was glaring at something by the stage, Artie and Tina were just looking at Rachel sleeping and Kurt was humming to himself while Mercedes admired Logan. Mr. Schue was just quiet and Matt and mike were not here while Brittany was telling Santana something about Rachel.

Jesse was staring at Rachel's sleeping form, with the needle coming out and the IV bag being squeezed lightly by the blond guy. He felt sick himself. Shelby had left the room for a phone call.

It wasn't long until Rachel woke up and she frowned, she opened her eyes and saw Logan talking to the computer, she remembered she had been talking to the Glee kids and then… nothing.

She slowly sat up and Logan stopped talking to help her, "I am sorry, I must have fallen asleep. What were we talking about?" she smiled and they seemed quiet, too quiet. It was Quinn who talked first, "Beth is now 4 months old…" her smile faltered and she gave the baby in Quinn's arms a big gasp. "She's beautiful, Quinn. I am happy for you". she smiled again and then something caught her attention.

The people in the auditorium watched as she furrowed her brows and her eyes became sharp. She turned to Logan, "Go to the piano, Madame Khoel is coming and I should have been warming up". Rachel was still Rachel, bossy as hell.

The computer was set on the table beside her, giving everyone a clear sight of her, she moved slowly to the edge and took a deep breath. "The song we've been working on, are you ready for it?" she asked and she rubbed the arm with the IV needle, "You mean the one by Pink?" he asked and she nodded.

"You should rest, you know Rach? I mean throwing up is okay, but blood? I don't think you should push it much", that was a new fact. The had puked blood? That was definitely not good. She glared daggers at Logan, "I am very aware of that, and I researched a bit, is it normal with stress. I am perfectly fine and I will not allowe you to stop me from proving myself to Madame Khoel".

The afromentioned woman walked in, and they all watched as Rachel's mouth was shut in a firm line. "Rachel, how are you feeling dear?" she asked and Rachel smiled, "Perfectly fine, I was about to start my practice". The lady sat down and her posture was almost as perfect as Rachel's.

The music started and even though she was supposed to play a song by Pink, she was going to do something different. Instead she searched on the computer for the file and pressed PLAY. All the way back in Lima, Ohio, the Glee club and some others watched her.

_When I, thought I knew you_

_Thinking, that you were true_

_I guess I, I couldn't trust_

_'Cause your bluff time is up_

_'Cause I've had enough_

_You were, there by my side_

_Always, down for the ride_

_But your, joy ride just came down in flames_

_'Cause your greed sold me out of shame, mmhmm_

_After all of the stealing and cheating_

_You probably think that I hold resentment for you_

_But, uh uh, oh no, you're wrong_

_'Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do_

_I wouldn't know just how capable I am to pull through_

_So I wanna say thank you_

_'Cause it makes me that much stronger_

_Makes me work a little bit harder_

_It makes me that much wiser_

_So thanks for making me a fighter_

_Made me learn a little bit faster_

_Made my skin a little bit thicker_

_Makes me that much smarter_

_So thanks for making me a fighter_

_Oh, ohh_

_Never, saw it coming_

_All of, your backstabbing_

_Just so, you could cash in_

_On a good thing before I realized your game_

_I heard, you're going around_

_Playing, the victim now_

_But don't, even begin_

_Feeling I'm the one to blame_

_'Cause you dug your own grave, uh huh_

_After all of the fights and the lies_

_Yes you wanted to harm me but that won't work anymore_

_Uh, no more, oh no, it's over_

_'Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture_

_I wouldn't know how to be this way now, and never back down_

_So I wanna say thank you_

_'Cause it makes me that much stronger_

_Makes me work a little bit harder_

_Makes me that much wiser_

_So thanks for making me a fighter_

_Made me learn a little bit faster_

_Made my skin a little bit thicker_

_It makes me that much smarter_

_So thanks for making me a fighter_

_She was great, as usual, and that spark in her eye was back. God, he hoped Rachel would bounce back from whatever she had, but now again? Why was he worring about her? Oh yeah, because he was still the jerk that loved her._

_Jesse St. James was still hopelessly in love with Rachel Berry._


	4. I won't understand until you tell me

He took deep breaths, it was getting very infuriating as the hours passed by, when the video finally ended, Rachel had said goodbye and Logan had tucked her in, he was trying to not get jealous, but god dammit, what was that?

He took a deep breath and said hello at that time, but not only was it hard, but the Logan guy gave her a kiss on the forehead and had whispered something in her ear, she had only nodded, her eyes closed. "Of course, tomorrow is our special presentation…" her voice trailed off in a whisper. Special presentation? He wished he could see her.

* * *

It was not until a couple of days later that they received various e-mails from Rachel's account, and once more, after Glee Rehearsal, they sat down in the auditorium, this time they checked all exits. Last time Jesse had come in and they hadn't even seen him. He had seen the whole Rachel ordeal and when the video call was over, he had demanded to Rachel's current living place.

Of course, Puck had given him the finger and Tina just stuttered, "Ju- just g-get the fuck o-out", both which were rewarded with sly smiles from the other Glee members. But it was Artie who answered truthfully, "Jesse, Rachel left the week of the Regional's… she's in Germany right now". And it wasn't the confusment that blinded Jesse, instead it was the heartbreaking. She had left, and she hadn't told him anything.

He had stormed out of the room before Shelby could tell them of the upcoming event, when she calmly explained of the agreement, but Mr. Schue just had to hold it off, after all, they still hadn't found someone to replace Rachel.

It wasn't until he was alone in his own home, in his own room with the door locked, the shower running with him in it that he let himself cry a bit for her. He dried himself and with that, he promised himself next time he saw Rachel, he would ask for forgiveness no matter what.

* * *

It had been weird, she had just fed beth and yet, the small baby was still hungry, she was sot beautiful and it was these times that she was more than glad she had kept the baby, Puck had been helping out and yet it was Finn who was like a father too, but she had no ties to any of them. Even though Puck was the father, she didn't love him.

And even though she loved him enough, she could see his feelings for Rachel, she bit her lip. Rachel was her friend, but she didn't understand how she managed to make Puck and Finn fall for her. She sighed as she put Beth down for her noon nap time and opened the door to find a rain soaked Puck, "Oh God, Puck? What the hell are you doing?" she asked and her voice raised. In his hand, was Beth's favorite unicorn plushy, "She left it at my house, and I know she hates not sleeping without it, so I had to bring it over…" his voice trailed off, it was these moments that made Quinn think Puck was a great father.

* * *

He smiled as he took the small video camera, he had secretly been sending videos of Rachel to the Glee club kids, but it was also fun. She'd just be herself, and so far the guys had liked it. Last night, she had been singing in the piano room when he walked in, and she just smiled and continued. There was a trip to Ohio this week-end and she had been more than excited to visit.

My guess is that Madame Khoel wanted to see Rachel's parents and while we were at it, check out this Glee club she had heard from. It was pretty insane how good Rachel was but then again, Rach was good at most things, but one of the things she sucked at was socializing. She had a pathological need to be popular, she had told him when she arrived, she also specified she hadn't wanted to make any friends because she would only get hurt.

"OH my dear god! Logan!" he didn't hesitate in running to her direction, and there she was, standing on the chair while watching with killing eyes a small mouse perched on the piano, he had never laughed so hard in his life. Truth was, Rachel could be a bitch, honest. But she was also caring and passionate and she was talented. She taught him to bake every Sunday night. He loved her.

Time had gone by really fast, he realized. When had she arrived at the lobby of the Academy? Only 6 months ago? It seemed longer, but then again, she wasn't looking good lately. A couple of weeks ago, she had been vomiting blood and all he could think was that she'd collapse soon and she wouldn't be able to stand up.

He was hoping that would never happen, but she had been close to that one time, she had fallen down and passed out cold on him, he had never been so afraid for someone else's health in his entire life. She had looked so weak and there were some things no one knew about her. And she had told him, he had smiled at most of them. Who would have thought Rachel Berry had a wild side? Definitely not him, but Noah Puckerman, he would have some questions for that ass.

* * *

It was Monday when they arrived at the airport, the whole class was with them and Rachel was all smiles, but before he could even think of meeting the Glee kids, they had a show to perform, and against some very good performers too, but we had confidence in our act. And so we ended up in an auditorium full of people and against Vocal Adrenaline too.

And our luck, Rachel decided her stomach is upset and ran to the bathroom. I too, followed, and got lost on the way. I saw a man on the way, "Excuse me, do you know where the women bathrooms are?" He actually looked kind of familiar but Rachel was still sick and that mattered the most.

"There on the next hallway…" he trailed off and I stormed off screaming "Rachel!" all over again, the man seemed startled and for a minute looked at me, but decided to not ask anything. He just left and I found her, just coming out of the restroom. She frowned and I just held her hand, she had been getting worse and yet she pressured herself with all the notes and dance steps. She shook her head and we headed off to the backstage room, when we walked in they all stood. We were 15 in total and Rachel had a solo.

I pushed back the flavor of blood back into my throat and I walked out with the other 3 girls, our first song was 'I Will Be' and even though I wished we had practiced more, this was the time. After this, it was Lima. And Glee. And everyone.

The lights dimmed, I could see Vocal Adrenaline sitting in the front seats, I took one deep breath and one quick look in the mirror, Karl had helped me with my outfit while Anne had done my make-up. I felt powerful as I stepped out on the stage.

"And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, all the way from Germany, Jilliards-Khoel Talented Performers Academy! Please give them an applause!" and the clapping began, the curtains drew and there were four blurry boxes, I was in one of them and the music started, I clutched the microphone and pushed the box open.

This was Rachel Berry's time, and no one was going to stop me from becoming the star my fathers had always wanted.

* * *

She was here. Rachel was in Ohio, and she had just started singing. My pulse accelerated, my throat went dry and I could only watch. Between 4 girls, they did the first song, but then other men came out and started with their own music. A mash-up.

I couldn't help but think how pretty Rachel looked, and the paleness was almost gone as far as I could see. She was looking around and yet her eyes never crossed or even looked at mine, perhaps she knew I would be watching. I saw the rest of my teammates with confused faces, of course. They never knew Rachel had left, I was the only one besides Shelby.

I sat and waited, she was passionate about it but when it ended, the lights went off and I didn't see her again. They won, and Shelby was pissed. She ended it with bringing us back to Carmel's auditorium and making us rehearse until dawn. But I couldn't seem to think straight.

Rachel was there. She was in front of him, and he couldn't move, he couldn't ask for forgiveness, he could only watch as she hugged the blonde guy -Logan, his mind reminded him- and while he dazed off, Mr. Schue walked in the huge room, "Shelby!" he said and waved with a friendly smile, he ended up sitting beside her and he watched as they talked.

It wasn't until he left that he got caught on the situation, "The Challenge is on, and we will be hosted by McKinley high this Friday", that was in two days! God, this meant triple work. It was going to be tough, but they would defeat the Glee kids, again.

* * *

She walked into the main doors of McKinley High, beside her was Logan, and he held her hand tight. She knew he was more nervous than they were, truth was, Logan had been an exceptional friend when she was in need, but they were the people who were inside who she loved truly.

She waked slowly, followed by her own Academy friends, and Madame Khoel walked in front of her, when they neared the main doors to the auditorium, she took a deep breath and walked in, she squeezed Logan's hand one last time and walked faster, she had meant to surprise them but Madame Khoel decided to call out, which honestly, pissed me off. "Mr. Schuester, I am Madame Khoel, these are my children", she said and Mr. Schue turned around.

I smiled and Noah walked closer, I ran to him and hugged him, he hugged back and I smiled into his chest, "Noah! What happened to your Mohawk? Did Sarah shave it off? Or did your mother make you get rid of it? It is so different, I had gotten used to your caveman hair and now look, the caveman ha-!" she got cut of by his hand. "Dude, you have to learn to shut up", he said but he was smiling.

She pulled away and hugged the other Glee kids, and then stopped in front of Finn, "Hi Finn, would it be awkward if I hugged you too?" she asked and he just smiled, she had missed that smile too. He just hugged her, when she pulled apart, she smiled. "It feels great to be back, and While I am here, mind as well introduce to you all, Logan". And there he was, standing awkward, she rolled her eyes and took his hand, tugging him near.

"I do not know why you are shy all of the sudden, given the fact you have met them all before, have you not?" she asked and he just nodded. "Hiya, It's nice to finally meet you all, Logan Needham everyone", he said and shook hands.

I turned around and smiled at Mr. Schue, "Thank you for inviting us while we were still in the country", I said and he understood my secret meaning, _Thank you for making me come here_, I turned and saw Shelby with Vocal Adrenaline. I only nodded and turned to my own Academy friends, "Anne, Karl! These are my friends I was just telling you about, come meet them if you will", I said and soon enough everybody was socializing.

Carmel High just sat there, and I refrained myself from nearing them, after all, Jesse was there. Finally, Shelby stood no more and neared Mr. Schue and Madame Khoel, they made the introductions and soon enough everyone was getting ready.

Mr. Schue neared us and smiled, he clapped his hand once and spoke to everyone in the room, "Okay guys, Miss Khoel, Shelby and I agreed to have the academy kids do each one song from their disposition, and thus we will be updated with their talents, okay?"

We all nodded. Time to start what we really came here to, make Madame Khoel proud of us.

* * *

Great, now we had to sing again too? By our selves? What the heck? I sighed and Madame Khoel gave me her warning look. I remained quiet after that. "Logan, since you have showed us just how much excitement you have been keeping to yourself, mind as well go first", Oh I just knew she'd do this to me. She hated when I wasn't perfectly polite. Screw her, I'd show her just how good I could be.

I stood up and smiled at Rach, "Here goes nothing", I whispered and shoved the lucky charm we always carried into my pocket, I hoped onto stage and looked at James, our musician and for this time, DJ. "Bruno Mars, Hit It, Jimmy" I said and took a deep breath before the music began.

**_Ohhh..._**

**_Oh her eyes, her eyes_**

**_make the stars look_**

**_like they're not shining_**

**_Her hair, her hair_**

**_falls perfectly_**

**_without her trying_**

**_She's so beautiful_**

**_and I tell her everyday_**

**_Yeah I know, I know_**

**_when I compliment her_**

**_she wont believe me_**

**_And it's so it's so_**

**_sad to think she_**

**_don't see what I see_**

**_But everytime she asks me do_**

**_I look okay_**

**_I say_**

**_When I see your face_**

**_there's not a thing_**

**_that I would change_**

**_Cause you're amazing_**

**_Just the way you are_**

**_And when you smile_**

**_the whole world stops_**

**_and stares for a while_**

**_Cause girl you're amazing_**

**_Just the way you are._**

**_Her lips, her lips_**

**_could kiss them_**

**_all day if she'd let me_**

**_Her laugh, her laugh_**

**_She hates but_**

**_I think it's so sexy_**

**_She's so beautiful_**

**_and i tell her_**

**_everyday_**

**_Oh you know, you know_**

**_you know_**

**_I'd never ask_**

**_you to change_**

**_if perfect is what_**

**_you're searching for_**

**_then just stay the same_**

**_So don't even bother asking_**

**_if you look okay_**

**_You know I say_**

**_The way you are_**

**_The way you are_**

**_Girl you're amazing_**

**_Just the way you are_**

**_[Chorus]_**

**_Yeaaaaah._**

I saw the shocked and some blushing faces on the stage, I thought I had nailed it for Rach, but she seemed to think otherwise. "Logan, you had some note flaws, but other than that and some rhythm problems, you were almost perfect", she said and smiled, I wasn't lying when I said she was amazing.


	5. What you can hide with a smile

He sat down and his fellow teammates in Vocal Adrenaline narrowed their eyes, he was good. But it was him that had the glare aiming at the blonde man, he had sung for Rachel and he knew it. He clenched his fists, why had he been so jealous? Why couldn't he just forgiven her? He breathed in slowly and deeply. He just had to sit and watch the rest, trying to be calm.

The other just clapped as he hoped off stage and he smiled coyly at Rachel, she was telling him about his flaws, but then again, this was Rachel we were talking about. They were all sitting on the first and second lines, but he was near Rachel and that was what mattered. A sudden sound startled them all and he turned to see it was Logan's watch.

He stood and Jesse watched in silence. Now what?

* * *

He stood up when the alarm sounded, he turned to Rach, "Where did you put the medicine?" he asked her and she just frowned, "Logan, there is no need for it at this moment, let's just enjoy the show we had put on for out fellow performers", she said and he just took her hand, "Rachel Berry, take the damn medicine before you pass out again", he said and Finn stood up.

"Rachel, you passed out?" he asked and his face was contortioned in confusement and pain. She ogled him for a minute and then just scowled, "I am perfectly fine, Logan is just making a big deal out of the situati-!" she got cut off by his words, "Oh, was I making a fuss out of it when you passed out? Or when you started vomiting blood? Or when you god dammit fainted during a middle of a dance? Or clutched your abdomen while sobbing in pain? God Dammit Rachel, take the darn medicine!" he said and pulled her towards him.

He pulled her out of the auditorium and Jesse stood up, "Like hell am I going to allow him to pull her around like a rag doll" he said as he followed closely. He found them fighting out on the hall, "I am perfectly fine! And you have just alarmed my friends, Logan, that was the last thing I had meant!" her voice was rising. She just shook her head, her hand clutching her side, "It's starting to hurt, isn't it?" he asked her and Jesse neared them.

"Rachel. I need to talk to you", Logan gave him a glare and just shook his head, "Give her a minute" he said and took the bag from the auditorium, he came back with a water bottle and a box of pills, "Two every six hours, you know the drill, Rach", he said and walked away.

* * *

She sighed and popped them in her mouth, with one quick water gulp they went down. "What do you want Jesse? Are you going to throw more eggs at me? If you are, then just give me a minute to catch my own breath" she said and he blinked, he had never heard Rachel be sarcastic towards anyone.

She took deep breaths and her eyes became focused again, she stood straight, "If you excuse me, I have a show to start", she said but when she tried to pull away, his hand shot out and grabbed her wrist, she was pulled into him and he leant his forehead against hers, "Rachel, don't walk away from me" he whispered and she closed her eyes. "I can't Jesse, I can't do this now."

She pulled away and walked back, her steps faltering a bit, but she refused to have him play her again, she sat down beside Logan and smiled, "I am sorry, you are mostly right. I should take more care of myself", she said and squeezed his hand once before turning to face the stage again.

She sat there as her own teammates performed, Karl doing an excellent job with 'If it's love' by Train, Anne singing 'I'm OK' from Christina Aguilera, and the rest of the performances just went through, she never really thought it would come down to this, and so she was trying to think of what song to choose.

She was deep in thought when Madame Khoel called out for her, "Rachel?" she repeated and I snapped my head up, "I'm sorry, I was distracted, is it my turn yet?" I asked and Madame Khoel just nodded. Mr. Schue just smiled, "We've heard Rachel before, Miss Khoel" he said and I stood up never the less, "I have gotten better", and with that, I saw them all look at me, as I walked to Brad, I made up my mind.

I whispered into his ear my selection of song and I went back up on the stage, I looked at everyone before the music started, with the microphone in between my hands, I started the emotional song…

_I can almost see it_

_That dream i'm dreaming but_

_There's a voice inside_

_My head saying_

_You'll never reach it_

_Every step i'm taking_

_Every move i make feels_

_Lost with no direction_

_My faith is shaking_

_But I , gotta keep trying_

_Gotta keep my head held_

_High_

_There's always gonna be_

_Another mountain_

_I'm always gonna wanna to_

_Make it move_

_Always gonna be an uphill_

_Battle_

_Sometimes i'm gonna have_

_To lose_

_Ain't about how fast i get_

_There_

_Ain't about_

_What's waiting on_

_The other side..._

_It's a climb_

_The struggles i'm_

_Facing_

_The chances i'm taking_

_Sometimes might knock me_

_Down, but_

_No i'm not breaking_

_I may not know it but_

_these are the moments_

_That_

_I'm going to remember most_

_Yeah_

_Just got to keep going_

_And i ..._

_I got to be strong_

_Just keep pushing on..._

_Cause There's always gonna be_

_Another mountain_

_always going to want to_

_make it move_

_always going to be an uphill_

_battle_

_sometimes you going to have_

_to lose_

_ain't about how fast i get_

_there_

_ain't about what's waiting on_

_the other side..._

_it's a climb_

_there's always gonna be_

_another mountain_

_i'm always gonna want to_

_make it move_

_always gonna be an uphill_

_battle_

_sometimes i'm gonna have_

_to lose_

_ain't about how fast i get_

_there_

_ain't about what's waiting on the other side..._

_it's a climb_

_yeah.._

_keep on moving_

_keep climbing_

_keep the faith baby.._

_it's all about_

_it's all about_

_the climb..._

_keep the faith_

_keep your faith.._

_ohh_

_ohhh..._

She regained her breath and saw some apprehensive faces, but it was Quinn who had been distracted with Beth, She smiled as she walked calmly out of the stage, she sat beside Quinn and smiled at the baby she held, Beth was indeed beautiful. She was now almost 6 months old, and how did she regret not being there for the delivery. She frowned, the looks were still upon her, and do not get her wrong, she loved the attention, but not this type.

"Madame, how long are we staying here?" she asked out loud, and she heard the response clearly, "About a Week, Miss Berry". she smiled, a whole week to spend with glee, and during a break from school. Perfect.

"Will our rehearsals be continued then?" she asked and Madame just nodded, she frowned, that didn't leave her much time for her friends. "Then, will we be rehearsing again today?" she asked and Madame shook her head once, she turned to Beth as Madame turned to Mr. Schue, "I would like us to meet again during our visit", she said and was instantly surrounded by her Glee teammates, she smiled and paid attention to all that had happened during her absence.

It was around the time of Kurt explaining Finn's horrible clorhing during his 'Obvious depression' that Madame Khoel just said one word, "Umringen", and she stood up and gathered with the rest. "Morgen mittag Zeit" she said and we all said a simple nod, "Ja". I turned to the Glee members, who just stared in confusement. I just shook my head, "I learnt a few German words during my stay, I will have to talk to you later, I need to introduce Logan to my parents", she said and waved by while grabbing her bags.

"Logan, hurry will you? After all, my fathers are not fans on impuctuality, but I assure you they will like you", she took his hand and squeezed it lightly, he smiled at her and when they were leaving, Jesse stopped them. "So you leave a couple of months and you date again? God Rachel, I see nothing of this affected you", he said and his grip tightened on her arm.

She looked at him straight in the eye, "I am not dating Logan, but even if I was, that would be not any of your business, Jesse", Logan stopped walking, "Wait, this is Jesse? The guy who threw eggs at you?" he demanded and looked at jesse, who was now wearing a guilty and pained expression on his face.

"I…" he didn't finish, after all, Logan had him by the collar, "OH god, Logan! Put him down!" she said and tried to make him put the other man down, "No, you kept on crying for this scumbag, I will not put him down just like that, Rachel", he said and Jesse looked at Rachel, she was biting her lip.

"Please put him down, Logan. I hate violence and you are very aware of it", she whispered, but he wouldn't listen to her, until Madame Khoel simple said the magical words if you may, "Logan Needham, put that boy down before I bring him down myself. And if that does not work, I will personally call off any performance of your for the whole year. Do you hear me young boy?" she threatened and he put him down.

"Ja, Mama, don't fret" he said and just glared at Jesse, "Stay away from her, you've hurt her enough". And with that, Jesse St. James watched Logan Needham pull Rachel Berry out of School grounds, he couldn't say a word.

* * *

She woke up to her usual alarm, and when she woke, she wondered for a minute where was she just to realize foolishly she was at her home in Ohio. She sat up and stretched, followed by her usual exercise routine and breakfast. Later, she woke Logan up at their visitor's room and she laughed when the not morning riser got up from bed after almost 10 minutes of nagging, as Noah would say it.

They were all supposed to meet in Carmel's Auditorium, which she was not particularly joyful about but when she walked down the stairs and started on making pancakes for the whole family, she realized she missed this. She had missed this normal and yet special tradition of hers, and throughout breakfast, she remained smiling and talking to the grumpy Logan who was still half asleep.

It was around 11 am when they left her house, it was quite a ride down to Carmel High and when they arrived, Logan was mostly annoyed to see Jesse waiting there, along with Vocal Adrenaline and Shelby. They neared their own group and said their 'Good Mornings', and during that, Rachel pinched him repeatedly. It was when they arrived when she took his arm and led the way to Jesse.

"Jesse, Logan has something to say to you, if you may just be silent", Jesse just smiled at Rachel and was simply glad she was talking to him, "" he mumbled and Rachel pinched him again, "I didn't hear that, Logan", she scolded and Jesse arched an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry for effin trying to impose violence on your self, but I meant what I said, stay the hell away from her", he said as he pulled Rachel away, "Thank You" Rachel said but was rudely interrupted by Jesse, "I can't do that, you see, I plan on getting Rachel back". and with that, Rachel blinked. What had just happened?

It didn't matter, she had changed into her ballet/workout clothes and stepped onto the stage, Madame Khoel was just sitting down with her fresh coffee when the music and lights were adjusted, Rachel just stretched and began twirling. It wasn't until the "Beginnen" bark from the usual giddy woman that it all began, the music began and she grabbed the microphone, _**grace and talent**_, she reminded herself, _**were utterly important. **_

_Closed off from love, _

_I didn't need the pain_

_Once or twice was enough and it was all in vain_

_Time starts to pass before you know it you're frozen_

_But something happened for the very first time with you_

_My heart melted to the ground, found something true_

_And everyone's looking 'round, thinking I'm going crazy_

_But I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you_

_They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth_

_My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing_

_You cut me open_

_And I keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love_

_I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love_

_Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love_

_You cut me open_

_Trying hard not to hear but they talk so loud_

_Their piercing sounds fill my ears try to fill me with doubt_

_Yet I know that the goal is to keep me from falling_

_But nothing's greater than the rush_

_That comes with your embrace_

_And in this world of loneliness I see your face_

_Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy_

_Maybe, maybeBut I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you_

_They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth_

_My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing_

_You cut me openAnd I keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love_

_I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding love_

_Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love_

_You cut me openAnd it's draining all of me_

_Oh, they find it hard to believe_

_I'll be wearing these scars for everyone to see_

_I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you_

_They try to pull me away but they don't know the truth_

_My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing_

_You cut me openAnd I keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding loveI keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding loveKeep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding lo__ve_

_You cut me openAnd I keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding loveI keep bleeding, _

_I keep, keep bleeding love_

_Keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love_

_You cut me open_

_And I keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love_

She was exceptional but then again, why had Madame Khoel made her stop? That was easy, "Smile Rachel, put on your show face", and thus, I watched Rachel berry be bossed around like a rag doll, and I couldn't stop it. I watched her sigh and sing that song a dozen times, until she got it perfect. Not even Shelby pushed them that much, no wonder she had been getting sick.

It wasn't until their break that Jesse pulled Rachel into one of the halls and into a closet and kissed her senseless. "I am sorry, I am truly sorry. I… I will let you hit me with eggs and make me wear something horrible, I will even allow you to hear me sing off-key and post it on YouTube, but don't walk out from me again, Rachel. I am begging you", he whispered and she just looked at him.

He took it as yes, and kissed her again. This time, he would make it right.

* * *

**Oooooh, what was that? What do you think my dear readers? Jesse is finally asking for forgivennes, but poor Rachel is being loved from every possible male side, I mean: Finn, Noah, Logan, and Jesse? Holy Shit, lucky girl… Review please, reviews make me write(;**

**WobblyWallyIsInLove**


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